gopellmell: August 2011

Lord Noel's advice to Claustrophobics

Whatto! Peeps..

I have a love of open spaces and can also endure small spaces too.
This may be as a direct result of my expert training whilst attached to the Special Forces Regiment during my time at the Foreign office...
...or it could be because I used to like to shut myself in the small cupboard under the sink...
...pretending that I'd run orf - thereby worrying the life out of my dear Mamma.
Either way I decided to share this special tip regarding overcoming the fear of closed spaces for those people who are otherwise known as Claustrophobics:
You can reduce your likelihood of panic in small spaces like lifts by always carrying with you a pair of binoculars and looking at the world through the wrong end.

You're welcome!

Tallyho!
Best Wishes - Lord Noel

Lord Noel Asks "Did You Know?"

Whatto! Peeps...

Did You Know?

That the most frustrating drink in the world is exasparilla.

You're welcome!

Tallyho!

Best Wishes - Lord Noel

Lord Noel on "Reasons to Google It"

Whatto! Peeps....

It seems such a short time since we had to trawl through a set of family Encyclopedias to find out something we wanted to know more about....
...now we just 'Google it'...
...and Google is so helpful that it even gives 'suggestions'...
...to save you having to type in the whole phrase...
...as these users found out...

Tallyho!

Best Wishes - Lord Noel

Lord Noel's Thought For The Day

Whatto! Peeps...

Todays 'Thought for the day' is an old proverb that a Mongolian man named Neville taught me whilst I sat with him on the foothills outside his rickety old wooden temple....

He said "Lord Noel...

Fool me once, shame on you.

Fool me twice, shame on me.

Fool me three times...

...and I'll smash your face in!"

Tallyho!

Best Wishes - Lord Noel.

Lord Noel on 007

Whatto! Peeps...

I'd like to wish my very good friend Sean Connery a very happy birthday!
He's 81 years old and still someone who your mum and your sister would 'do'.
As a close friend of Seans (or Sir Thomas as he likes to be called) I am often asked "Lord Noel - does Sean Connery like herbs?" and I answer "Yes he does... but only partially".
I can however reveal that Sean Connery doesn't own his dog... he has it on a leash.
But he's a very thoughtful and kind pet owner...the first thing Sean taught his dog to do was to shit.
Hanging around with Sean, I get to see the 'real' him....for instance I've just seen one of Sean's rubbish attempts at knitting!...To be honest when he told me what it was meant to be... it was a bit of a shock. And whenever I've stayed over at his place I've found that his hair is always in a mesh first thing in the morning.
In the end I had to ask him to leave when he told me he wanted to "Shit on my Chauffeur"

Tallyho!
Best Wishes - Lord Noel